WikiQueer:Don't be inconsiderate
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This page is an essay on civility. It contains the advice and/or opinions of one or more editors on how civility may be interpreted. It has not been accepted as a WikiQueer policy or guideline, though it may be consulted for assistance during an act of disruptive behavior or when sanctions that shall be taken against an editor, and may become accepted as a guideline at a future date. The degree of consensus that went into creating this essay (a potential measurement of the reliability of the advice) can be judged by consulting the history and talk pages. WikiProjects are encouraged to write essays on civility. Please update the page as needed or discuss it on the talk page. |
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This page in a nutshell: Do not be abrasive and inconsiderate. If people abided by this, we would not need any other policies about behavior. |
"Do not be abrasive and inconsiderate" is the fundamental rule of all social spaces.
[edit] Fundamentals
See also: WikiQueer:Consensus
Although nobody on WP is empowered to ban or block somebody for being inconsiderate (as this would be an instance of being inconsiderate), it is still a bad idea to be inconsiderate. So do not do it.
No definition of being inconsiderate has been provided. This is deliberate. If a significant number of reasonable people suggest, whether bluntly or politely, that you are being inconsiderate, the odds are good that you are not entirely in the right.
Being right about an issue does not mean you're not being inconsiderate! An inconsiderate person can be right — but they're still inconsiderate; if there is something in what they say that is worth hearing, it goes unheard, because no one likes listening to inconsiderate people. It does not matter how right they are.
[edit] Coping with being labeled inconsiderate
See also: WikiQueer:Incivility
If you have been labeled as inconsiderate, especially if you have been told this by several people in a particular community, it might be wise to consider the possibility that it is true. If you suspect that you may be inconsiderate, the first step is to become aware of it. Ask yourself what behavior might be causing this perception. Try changing your behavior and your mode of presentation. In particular, identify the harsh words in your communications and replace them with softer ones.
Honestly examine your motivations. Are you here to contribute and make the project good? Or is your goal really to find fault, get your views across, or be the one in control? Perhaps secretly inside you even enjoy the thrill of a little confrontation. This may not make you a bad person, but to everyone who is busily trying to build something great, you become an impediment. People get frustrated, rancor ensues, the atmosphere changes, and the whole project suffers. Are you here to give, or to take?
If appropriate, publicly apologize to anyone to whom you may have been abrasive and inconsiderate. It is okay; this will not make you seem weak. On the contrary, people will take notice of your willingness to cooperate and will almost always meet your efforts with increased respect.
Telling someone "Do not be inconsiderate" is something of an inconsiderate move in itself, so do not bandy the criticism about lightly.
